barbie soap operas

Oh February, how fun you are.  Not ONLY are there only 28 days in a months (which is just day thievery   I mean I feel like there is a calendar thief out there who just decided to rob poor little February of two days because they found it humorous or something) but in this lovely month there is valentines day.
Any one who knows me well knows that I like to fight the cliche's and do my own thing.  Which means that although I think valentine's day has it's PURPOSE, it still is rather over rated.  Don't get me wrong, I still celebrate it.  Just in my own way.  Like I made a shoe box replica of the TARDIS with pictures of each of the 11 Doctors and some of my favorite companions and quotes and gave it to my best friend.  Time travel? BEST WAY TO CELEBRATE.  And every year I watch some kind of action movie of vday instead of romantic garble.  I ended up watching Elementary, which despite my hard core BBC fan girl tendencies toward Sherlock, is actually pretty good.

Just remember my few valentines motto's if you are feeling lonely:
-Valentine's Day is not lonely...for a plant, because they are A-sexual.  So if needed, go stand in a park near a tree and try to blend in.
-watch out for cupid, his arrows hurt.
-chocolate makes you sick. eat a banana instead.  "never go to a party without a banana"
-if you didn't get flowers, it's okay they might have made you sneeze any ways.  China knows they make me sneeze!  No, seriously, I sneeze so loud that my family jokes China can hear me.

ps: this is not a rant of a bitter single girl. Not single, just m opinions on the day.

So, yay for February   The other morning I got out to my car to find the car door completely frozen SHUT, which for California is COLD.  I was late to work because of the dumb Ice! And then when I had to drive someone somewhere at 8:30, still an inch of ice on the windshield   CURSE YOU MOTHER NATURE!  I don't know what she has against me, I don't smoke, I rarely drive anywhere and I like to recycle.  Heck I don't even like the taste of beef.  Just chicken. FEAR ME FEATHERED CHICKENS!  But really.  I love them. So, really, what does she have against me?  Rude mother nature.


So these past few months I have been a nanny for two little girls.  For their safety they will be child A, and child B.  Let me just say, it has been interesting!  Such as, just today child B and I went into the back yard and she decided that their fence was "swiper" (from the Dora kid show) and would tell him to stop swiping and then go poke him with a pricker ball!  I tried to get her to stop pricking the fence with a  pricker ball and stabbing it with a stick, so she dosen't think it's okay.  She told me that the likes to poke "swiper" and see him bleed.  I wonder if I should be worried that this little girl who loves to wear a tutu and put her hair in a "princess bun" also likes to stab an imaginary thieving fox and see him bleed.  Seems a little frightening and sadistic.
Child A on the other hand, welcomes me into a soap opera world known as her barbies and how she plays with them!  Not only do her barbies sometimes fly, or even better become flying mermaids (which isn't too weird, I did stuff like that too) but the dating lives of her barbies are more messed up than any tv show I have ever seen!  and she is under the age of five!  With two ken dolls and about 8 barbies, the ken doll will be with girlfriend(none of them have names, just girlfriend  boyfriend, mommy, and sister) then tell her she stole his jacket and he is done with her, then ask her sister to be her girlfriend and that they need to plan their wedding!  Then the new "girlfriend" breaks up with him because she likes the other ken doll better now and rides away from him on her pony, but too bad because that ken doll is with her daughter! tough luck let me tell ya.  and to add to all of this, half of this soap opera includes me picking up the ken dolls and having them chase the poor barbie dolls around the house! (apparently they are flying or something)  and all of this happens within about 3 minutes.  Did I mention this? SHE IS THE FUTURE WRITE OF A SOAP OPERA! I SWEAR!
          My personal favorite of this, is that I always have to make sure that I have hair ties with me when I go over to her house, because the barbies need to have their hair braided or put in pony tails.  Which is all fine and dandy, I usually just take them back when I leave.  However, my last hair tie just became a donation because it was busy clothing their poor ken doll in a paper towel toga-skirt!  That's right, they have only one set of ken doll clothes, and I just couldn't handle having a naked ken doll courting barbies anymore.  They deserve a more modest man.  So he get's to rock it with his SUPER MANLY paper towel skirt held up by my fashionable blue hair tie.  He rocks it. ;)  Before my lovely donation, she would want to use one ken doll and go "oh no he's naked!" and have me put clothes on him before he can become the primary ken doll in our love mess going on.  But to do that I would have to take the one set of clothes off the OTHER ken doll and leave the poor guy naked and discarded.  to which she would go "oh no, now he is naked!" oh goodness. little girls.  and the super CLASSY paper towel skirts their super playa ken dolls are subject to wear so they no longer date in their birthday suits.  as trendy as some may find that.

on a completely un related note, I had a cat bite my beanie, bite my hood and also(on a different occasion  she burrowed her head in my hair and licked my skull! it was wet.  and made me cold.

Well time for me to go. my cat is suspiciously pretending to read my blog. quite unsettling ;)
PEACE! don't freeze yo tooshies off!